Thursday, April 15, 2010

Mother of the Year, fa shizzle

I thought it was about time to give you all a few more excerpts from my parenting book.

1. When your kids get hurt, try to refrain from telling them to "suck it up" until after you get the x-ray results. It's one of those things they may remember when they get older.

2. When your child get his booster and is super sad like this:One way to cheer him up is to tell him he can be the one to let his older brother know he has to get a booster shot too. Totally works, see:3. When your kids get a hold of your camera and take a bazillion pictures of each other, make sure you look at each one carefully before you delete them. Cuz you could miss out on this:

4. When you have an old friend with photo skillz come into town, always take advantage of them by having them spend their Saturday taking pictures of your kids. Is it bad that I picked this one for my big framed one?

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Why I Don't Drink Wine/Easter Bunny

Have you ever seen the movie A Walk in the Clouds? If not, go ahead and watch it, I'll wait.
You know that part where they are all out harvesting the grapes, then they squash them for the wine? (Here's a clip of it, hopefully you speak spanish) Here's a few points I'd like to make about it.
1. When she took off her shoes to step on the grapes, notice she didn't wash them. And also, when she took off her shoes she wasn't wearing socks. So she was out working in a field in shoes with out socks. Can you even imagine how stinky and sweaty her feet were? And she just stuck those things straight into the grape pit.
2. She had really long frizzy black hair, that wasn't pulled back in a hair net before she started swinging it all around in that grape pit. I know she was trying to be all sexy, but all I could think about was the stray long black frizzy hairs that are getting all tangled up in those grapes.

Maybe they have more sanitary ways of doing things now, but all the most expensive wine is the old stuff that was made back when people use their nasty feet to make it. So if I can't drink the best, then I may as well not even waste my time. And also because the prophet said not to, duh.

On another note. I can't get my bold button to turn off now. But, this is how I got my kids to go to bed and not wait up to catch the Easter Bunny in action.


Thursday, April 1, 2010

So much to talk about.

Has it already been three weeks since my last post? Hmmm. What to do. What to do.