Sunday, September 28, 2008

SmartRemarks: The Host

Before you begin reading my review, I need to say this; Contrary to what you are about to read, I really did like this book. It's a like though, not a love. We hardly know each other.
First off, there were sooooo many similarities between The Host and another Stephenie Meyer book we all know and LOVE (not just like).
She continues to gab on about smells. We always have to hear how someone is smelling. I think Stephenie has a bit of a fetish with smells. And I can guarantee that before she was writing these books she sold Scentsy candles. They're wick less you know. To be fair, I am not a vampire (yet) a werewolf, or an alien. Apparently Stephenie has done a lot of research about all 3, and maybe she knows more about how they smell, or the things they can smell. All I know is, I can't wait to smell Edward, and I wouldn't mind smelling Jared. Not that I like Jared, I'm just curious.
She also continues to use the words "hiss" and "flank". Flank was seriously used on every other page. 620 pages divided by 2=310 times at least. Now I am not really complaining about this, I have grown quite fond of these words, I'm just saying they were used just as much, if not more, in the Twilight series. Don't you think a new series deserves a new favorite word?
There was a lot of burning skin going on in both books. Edward's skin burned when Bella touched him. Bella's skin burned cold when Edward touched her. Wanda/Melanie's skin burned from her temple to her cheek bone when Jared touched her. Actually I recall Edward using that same stroke on Bella's face. From the temple down her cheek. I thought, "Maybe there is a nerve ending there that is more sensitive." So I had Dwight stroke my cheek area. No burn at all. Am I dead inside?
On page 213, Melanie was so mad she bit her tongue and tasted blood. Jacob did this countless times. Again, a new series deserves a new way to react to anger.

There was also a lot of lifting "with ease" going on. No Vampires or Werewolves this time, just strong men that were able to lift the women up "with ease".
Let's move on. The beginning of the book was torturous! It took me forever to get into it. It started to get good when she was captured, but she hung out in that cave forever too. I think Stephenie eventually does a good job of helping you get to know her characters well. I like that about her. For some reason this is all I could picture any time Ian was mentioned.

I have no idea how she described him to look, but this is how he looked to me. Way groovin. Anyone who falls in love with a worm and then says she's gorgeous is groovin. I liked how the book ended, all fixed and happy. But I didn't like Wanda's new body. This is who I pictured for that.
There were a lot of church references again. She used the boiling frog analogy, a sacrament meeting talk favorite. There was the whole Satan's plan thing. And the law of consecration thing. My testimony didn't grow as much with this book as it did with the Twilight series, but it's ok, I went to church this whole month.


Landee said...

My testimony of the gospel grew more with The Host. My testimony of hawtness grew more with the Twilights.

I think I'm over Stephenie Meyer.

::biting tongue & tasting blood::

Until her next book, anyway.

Memzy said...

K, so I'm dangerously close to being "over" Steph. (that's what she wants me to call her) and I'm blaming all of you. You remember that commercial when we were kids where the boy was in his room and the dad caught him smoking and the dad pushes the son to tell him why he did it, etc? And the kid finally yells out, "I learned it from watching YOU!'

Soo, yeeeah.

1. I had Shed try the face burning trick and it worked. You are def dead inside.

2. I kept thinking of this boy named Ian that I knew a few years back and it double creeped me out.

Amanda said...

Awesome review! Some of those things I never noticed and I am so glad you pointed them out to me. I am definitely going to try the sensual stroke with Steve and see if any burning happens.

Landee said...

You gize are doing the cheek stroke on the wrong cheek.

sarastrasser said...

Morgan touched me from temple to jaw line and I had a burning but not in my cheek. Is that normal?? Maybe I should AskMemzy about that one.

Markie23 said...

I don't think she quite capture the smells that would exist, living in a cave with a bunch of guys. Maybe words are not sufficient to describe that smell.

Cristin said...

She does seem to have a fascination with smells...maybe she's pregnant.

Amy,I think you may be dead inside.


ajesplin said...

Grimace. I believe her word for this book was keening. Who says that?

For Mel inside Wanda, I pictured Jan Brady in the modern Brady Bunch Movie. Or the girl from that Fiesta Bowl proposal? "Jared," she breathed, walking forward with her arms outstretched, and then Jared cold-cocks her.

I noticed the tongue bite thing too. And I want you to try biting your tongue until it bleeds. Go on. Try it. That's right, it's impossible. Especially without jumping up and down and swearing profusely.

Erin Beck said...

Um hello you are all grossing me out here and K.I.M I am single and still a virgin

Amy Thurston said...

What? K.I.M?

Erin Beck said...

keep in mind